By Fazal Amin Shinwari
The growing number of deaths linked, directly or indirectly, to social media activity has raised serious questions about the intersection of digital culture, family pressure, online exploitation and violence.
Recent reports indicate that at least eight girls and women from Khyber Pakhtunkhwa have lost their lives in separate incidents in recent months. In some of the reported cases, TikTok and other video-sharing platforms have emerged as an important part of the circumstances surrounding the tragedies.
Two troubling factors stand out: violence committed in the name of honour and the growing risks associated with irresponsible social media use. In some reported cases, videos of young women were uploaded or circulated online before they faced intense opposition from their families and, allegedly, violent consequences.
In parts of Pashtun society, traditional expectations regarding women’s behaviour and family honour remain deeply rooted. When a woman’s conduct is perceived as crossing those boundaries, some families may respond with severe social pressure. But no cultural, family or social tradition can justify violence or murder.
There is, however, another uncomfortable aspect of the problem: society’s own role in creating and sustaining the online culture in which such behaviour flourishes.
TikTok has increasingly become a platform for competition over views, likes, followers and virtual gifts. During some live-stream battles, participants engage in abusive language, vulgar behaviour, personal insults and humiliating one another in an attempt to attract larger audiences and increase engagement.
Their followers and viewers may send virtual gifts that translate into financial rewards. As a result, what begins as entertainment can develop into a highly competitive online economy in which controversy, humiliation and provocative behaviour are sometimes rewarded with greater visibility and income.
This raises an important question: Is society merely watching this phenomenon, or is it also helping to fuel it?
Millions of users watch, like, share and financially support online personalities. Some followers establish private contact with women they encounter on social media, including through messaging applications and video calls. In certain cases, private conversations, photographs or recordings can later become tools for harassment, intimidation or blackmail.
The consequences can be devastating. Under intense pressure, victims may face threats, social isolation and psychological distress, while some cases can escalate into physical violence or even death.
The recent alleged murder of a well-known TikTok star, Shamso Bibi, known as Ayesha Gilamana, who reportedly had around 1.3 million followers, has also highlighted the stark difference between online popularity and real-life social support. Despite a huge following on social media, only a small number of people reportedly attended the funeral.
The contrast raises a difficult question: what does online popularity actually mean if millions of followers are present on a screen but only a handful of people stand beside a person in their final moments?
This does not, however, diminish the responsibility of perpetrators. The legal and moral responsibility for murder or violence rests with those who commit such acts. No victim should be blamed for being subjected to violence, and no concept of honour can justify taking another person’s life.
At the same time, society cannot ignore its own responsibility. When users continuously reward provocative content with views, likes, shares and virtual gifts, they contribute to an environment in which extreme online behaviour can become profitable and socially influential.
The response must therefore go beyond blaming individual victims or families. Young people and parents need greater awareness of digital privacy, cyber security, online exploitation and blackmail. Law-enforcement agencies must respond swiftly to cybercrime complaints, while social media platforms should strengthen safeguards against harassment, exploitation and abusive content.
Social media itself is neither inherently harmful nor responsible for violence. It is a tool for communication, expression and entertainment. The danger emerges when irresponsible online behaviour, the race for views and likes, financial incentives, family pressure, blackmail and violence become interconnected.
The protection of women and young people cannot be left solely to families or law-enforcement agencies. It is a collective responsibility.
The real challenge for society is not simply to ask why young people are using social media, but to ask what kind of behaviour society is rewarding—and what kind of behaviour it is allowing to become normal.
